A lot of people are guilty of child shaming without even realising it. Some do it as a way of discipling a child. Child shaming is not a form of discipline, it can lead to serious childhood trauma in a child’s life.
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People, including parents often underestimate the power of their words on kids. They forget that what they say to a child will define his or her world. Their words become the way a child speaks to himself. Shaming is anything any older person says that makes a child feel terrible about themself. It is an, often unintended, assault on their sense of identity. Child shaming can range from Why can’t you be more like your sister? Why are you so dramatic? Do you want me to give you a real reason to cry about? The choices you are making will ruin your life. The opposite of shaming would be to be respectful. To be supportive. To be encouraging.
It’s possible to discipline a child without bringing into question their competence, or their sovereignty.
Shame is a form of negative emotion which we as humans not only attach to the topic or subject at hand but the brain also cross references it to every other potentially connected learning to that event or situation. When they do something wrong make sure they understand why it is wrong and give them a way to make amends, say they are sorry and restore the relationship with hugs. Most importantly make sure your children know what is expected of them and what the consequences of wrong behaviour will be. Negative feelings about themselves and a negative self image will only bring about bad behaviour. All behaviour is the outcome of their self image and how they see the world about them.