What are the signs that you have outgrown a friendship?
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I don’t want to say, “outgrew” but, our interests and priorities just stopped aligning as much as they used to. They never want to hang out, I never get invited to events or game sessions, they’re emotionally unavailable, I could stay silent for months and no one would check up on me to see if I was okay, whenever I let them know something they said hurt my feelings it always needs to turns into an argument about what I should and shouldn’t be bothered by. Just overall abundantly clear that I cared way more for the group than they did for me. I noticed they weren’t showing any interest in my life and they didn’t know anything about me anymore when I decided not to tell them things without them asking.
Mentally I progressed and she did not. Still parroting what others say to be accepted without any original thought, still adopting other people’s interests to make herself interesting, still using the same derogatory playground insults most of us grew out of. It wasn’t obvious until I went a year without seeing her, then I realised most of the things I liked about her were an act and the things that were authentically her were dislikable. I went away to college and I remember getting back and just, nothing had changed with her. The same high school drama was still going on. The same fighting over the same terrible guys, the petty needling, she, at some point was even trying to maintain the same high school hierarchy. It was just dumb.