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I tend to fall quickly and deeply when I meet someone new, fantasizing about getting married and having babies after few dates, and getting obsessed. I know I can’t continue to repeat this circle, so how can I stop getting attached too quickly?
Why don’t you refocus that energy inwards. When you put that energy into yourself and your own personal hobbies, passions, activities that need for validation from the love-interest isn’t as prevalent. You feel more grounded, and when you are comfortable in your own life, that light radiates and attracts all the meaningful connections we all crave. I do not really attach to people unless they’ve been in my life a while. I don’t really miss people either. I view people as things that come in and out of my life, either at their whim or the whim of chance or whatever, and I’m fully prepared for anyone to leave at any time.
I understand where you are coming from. I have a tendency to do the same. My only suggestion is to continuously remind yourself of all the things you have to offer and focus on the things about yourself that make you awesome. It is an unfortunate commonality in human psychology that when someone shows deep interest in us, it becomes a turnoff. Don’t overplay your hand, remind yourself that you don’t truly know this person yet and there are maybe things that you won’t like about them as well. Do this to prevent yourself from finding disappointment when you do discover more about them. There could be many reasons for that. understanding why might help to make sense of it but if it’s making a normal life impossible I’d suggest seeing a therapist. But also keep in mind that there are different people with different personalities and behaviours, and just because others easily can let go doesn’t mean you have to too.