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Ricarda Roth
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Ricarda Roth
Asked: March 30, 20212021-03-30T14:15:59+01:00 2021-03-30T14:15:59+01:00In: Communication

Am I a transphobe if I can’t date a trans-woman?

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I don’t want to be tagged a transphobe, but I really cannot date a trans-woman, it’s just a personal preference not that I have hatred for them.

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    1. Aleisha Salcido
      Aleisha Salcido
      2021-04-01T18:06:57+01:00Added an answer on April 1, 2021 at 6:06 pm

      it’s not transphobic to choose not to date someone because they’re transgender. When it comes to matters as such, which are highly intimate and personal choices, there is no scope of claims of discrimination being made, in respect of a choice made by the person, in his/her discretion; to be discriminated against, one needs to be entitled to something which is being denied to him/her without a valid reason, and merely on the basis of his/her membership to a certain class of persons being discriminated against.
      To be transphobic is to have a strong hatred towards transsexual people. The mere fact that a person chooses not to associate with transsexual people, in general, or exclude them from his/her dating pool as prospective partners does not make him/her transphobic, where the person otherwise believes, his general distaste or aversion notwithstanding, that transsexual people ought not to be discriminated against, where there is scope of discrimination, i.e. in arenas such as employment, civil liberties etc. Would a person, who finds homosexual intercourse distasteful, and/or finds the concept of homosexuality repugnant, for whatsoever reason, but who simultaneously advocates for equal rights for gay people, in respect of marriage, employment, and other arenas where gay people are discriminated against, be considered homophobic, merely by virtue of him harboring a personal, not to mention inconsequential distaste for homosexuality and its implications? The answer is a plain and unequivocal no.

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    2. Art Frias
      Art Frias
      2021-04-01T18:07:51+01:00Added an answer on April 1, 2021 at 6:07 pm

      In order to discriminate against someone, you have to deny them a right and no one, including trans people, have a right to be viewed as sexually attractive by another person. People are attracted to who they are attracted to, and some people aren’t attracted to trans-people. It doesn’t mean they’re transphobic because the definition of transphobia is treating trans-people different then how you would like to be treated. So then if that definition is being applied to attraction, that means that everyone has to find everyone else attractive if they would like to be viewed as attractive by other people. That’s completely unfair and unreasonable as attraction is not something we have control over.
      Discrimination is wrong, you shouldn’t discriminate against people for any reason, including for their genitalia. But, discrimination is not encompassed under dating, or in that case you’d be required to date every person of every group who asked you out for the sole sake of not coming across ‘racist’ or ‘sexist’. Isn’t there more to dating than ‘this person asked me out’. Don’t you need to feel attracted to them? Should you forgo that for the sake of being politically correct? You can’t discriminate against someone by choosing not to date them, because having a date is not a right

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