What does it feel like to be confined to a rehab centre— what should my expectations be?

It’s really weird. It’s like being in another part of the world, days ago you were deep in your using lifestyle, now you’re not. You have my environment completely changed. And living communally when you most likely were spending all your time alone. That can be very hard, but, there’s other people there who are thinking the same things as you are. There are some people, myself included sometimes, who almost personify their addiction. And so, that little devil on your shoulder will be telling you everything is terrible there, that you don’t want to do anything in the rehab’s program, that it’s all a waste of time. That’s just your disease wanting to get you out of there and back to what you were doing. Eating right, talking with others, not chasing the dragon for that moment. Your mind, body, everything, will feel very weird because you are so used to being loaded. Emotions will be near the surface. In a couple of weeks, your libido kicks in and you feel like you’re 15 again. A lot of people think they “fall in love” (I did) but it’s just because your hormones working again – it’s a sign your body’s getting better. Take it as a sign you’ve been shutting yourself down for a long time. Dreams – oh man, dreams in early recovery. It was explained to me that I had not been sleeping for a long time, I had been passing out, so I had a lot of dreams stored up. I don’t know if that’s true, but I had very vivid dreams for a few months. An awful lot of them are about using, that might turn into trying to score dreams, that might turn into “shit, I’m fucked up, how did that happen?” dreams. It’s totally normal, but you wake up as if you had a nightmare, but then you realize… it was just a dream, you’re okay. It feels pretty worrisome, but it’s not – it’s just a dream. Things really aren’t that way, not right now. Maybe we just need a reminder. Take advantage of your situation. There will never again be a time where you’re not working, where there’s no drugs around, when you’re in that safe and environment, and be honest – the topic, your addiction, your whole reason you ended up there, is the absolute centerpiece of your life and has been for a long time. Finally, for once, this is about you, the real you. Rehabs are all set up differently, but I’m sure a common characteristic is you will rebel, at least mentally, about everything. But there’s a difference between reacting and taking what you can from it and leaving the rest. I learned a lot of things in rehab that I had no idea about. A good rehab has you pretty active – one thing to another, all day long every day. It feels exhausting. But you will most likely live through it, and there’s things to be had there – if nothing else, you’re spending some time not high and not scared to death every second. Relish that. As if you can, but… consider that those things could be true.