how do I ask my overprotective boyfriend to back off without hurting his feelings?
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I don’t think he’s going to listen to you. That sounds like a controlling stalking person. People who are like that, you can’t really fix them. By all means tell him to cut it out, but my guess is… at this time in his life, he wants to control others. Until he ends up lonely and depressed, and takes the time to realize why every girl in a 100 miles, is avoiding him…. he’s not going to change. You simply have to dump him.
He’s not a boyfriend … more like “the guy who is holding you hostage/probation officer”. It’s only going to get worse and he won’t stop if you tell him.
You asking this type of question (and being in this type of situation) means you have deeper issue which is SETTING UP BOUNDARIES.
People will treat you in whichever way you will let them treat you from the start.
You don’t like something SAY IT the first time it bothers you. If you don’t – you teach other person that this behavior is appropriate, and person will actually get pissed of when later you changed your mind.