After all, there is nothing more refreshing than talking with someone who gets what you’re going through. Do you become insensitive if you can’t listen to another person’s troubles because you have a lot going on for yourself?
Is it insensitive to not help someone with their problem if you’re going through a lot yourself?
Share
It’s absolutely okay. If you’re not in the right position to do something for somebody then you can’t do it. And it really doesn’t sound to me, from what you described here, as if you are insensitive. I think if people are at a point when they’re struggling too much with their own problems to have the mental energy to help somebody else the way that other person needs the lack of inner resources (unfortunately) can make them react insensitively. However, as unfortunate as it is, I get the impression that this is likely some kind of self protective/defense mechanism at work – acting as a warning sign to people to protect their wellbeing when it’s not at a strong point. One approach I recently took was to pass on information on alternative help resources via a third party who can pass that information onto them. That way I’ve still tried to do something for them, but at the same time I am not agreeing to anything that I know I can’t do.
No, it’s not insensitive. Your responsibility first and foremost is to your ownself. How can you give someone something positive when you yourself arent in a positive place? I’m a very emotional amd sensitive person myself and am inclined to leave everything to help the people I care about but when periods like this come I prefer to dissociate myself with people and talk time to myself to sort things out otherwise I end up lashing out irrationally and hurting the people I care about.
So it would be wise for you to give yourself space and surround yourself with an environment that calms you and lets you think, you can also let the people you care about know that you are currently not in a healthy state of mind to offer your help. You cannot help others if you can’t help yourself, so do not feel guilty if you can’t help others at one point or the other.