She’s stayed longer than the period she intended to stay for, now I’m finding her stay really repulsive. How do I ask her to leave politely?
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She’s stayed longer than the period she intended to stay for, now I’m finding her stay really repulsive. How do I ask her to leave politely?
this can definitely be really tricky. If you want to start out subtle, I suggest making motions to clear away glasses, dishes, etc. and start tidying the room a bit while saying, “Well, this has been a lot of fun; we’ve really got to do it again soon!” With any luck your guest will take the hint and leave. Some people, however, don’t get subtle and need a more drastic method called honesty. That would be something like, “Thanks so much for coming; I have really enjoyed your visit but I do look forward to seeing you again soon.”
This can be accompanied by walking them to the door, handing them their jacket, and generally acting like it was their idea to leave.
There are, remarkably, some humans who are dense enough not to understand even this kind of directness. For them, one must crank the honesty level. Don’t be cowed or discouraged! It’s your home and you get to decide when the visit is over.
This is not rude; it is being proactive about your needs and your time.
It really depends on several factors- If you want to maintain a good relationship, just be honest. Tactful and honest. And please, be direct. Don’t dance around and dance around trying to drop hints. Be direct and blunt. I once had a guest come stay for what was supposed to be 10 days. It ended up being three months. I worked a lot, so I didn’t give it much thought. But when the days rolled into weeks and the weeks turned into months and this guest showed no intentions of leaving, I knew it was time to address the situation. Being female, I tried being diplomatic and started dropping hints. My guest was either clueless or just plain ignored them. So I tried nudging my guest out the door. After five days, I came home from work and found my house completely destroyed. I’d spent the previous weekend doing a deep clean of my house and I was furious when I came home to a huge fucking mess. I marched into the living room, where my guest was sitting with a plate of Food.
“Get out,” I said.
“What? Why?” my guest asked.
“Because I’m tired of having you here. You were supposed to be here for 10 days and it’s been three months. I can’t stand this.”
“Is it about the mess? I can clean it up.”
“No. You are costing me too much money in food, utilities and supplies and I’m losing my sanity. You have officially worn out your welcome months ago. It is time for you to leave,” I said as I walked away. I hadn’t even hung up my coat or put my purse down yet.
My guest followed me around the house, pleading to stay. I stood firm.
The day my guest finally left, they destroyed my house. I mean, I had to clean a huge ass mess, get the carpets cleaned, patch and paint the walls, replace broken or missing items, you name it.