I get hit on by girls, hot girls, r-e-g-u-l-a-r-l-y. Okay I’m hot, fine fine. But it’s a shame, as I do not find girls attractive, sexually. There’s a problem I have with telling them off, most often, it doesn’t go well with them. Do I start going out with some kind of placard screaming “I’m gay”? I don’t know. I just need ideas, helpful ideas.
How can I tell a girl that likes me that I’m gay, in a way that will not seem embarrassing to her?
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Be real and honest with her, tell her that you are gay. The earlier the better. A moment like that is a revelation of character, it explains that you want to be upfront with your feelings and intentions and in no-way want to lead anyone on. Their response would be a character-revealing moment, either by accepting who you are as a person and acknowleding your sexual incompatibility; they could otherwise reject you and that would be the end of that. You are going to get farther in life and find people that you can be honest with. However, you are going to get stronger in life based on how people resist you and your presence. She, in the very least, deserves your honesty.
At a convenient and appropriate moment in a conversation simply say something like…
“I am really enjoying getting to know you and I want to continue building our friendship, but it will have to be limited to friendship because I am gay”
With a little luck you will get a smile and a reply like this:
“I was kinda sorta thinking you might be gay but I know you’re a good man and wanted to get to know you better in either case. Now let’s go continue building a friendship over coffee at Starbuck’s. My treat. Oh…how discreet do I need to be with this information? I don’t want to “out” you”. And if you’re not lucky enough to get something like that as a reply, we’ll, it isn’t he end of the world. You move.