How do you advise a person who’s fresh out of an abusive relationship to move on and stay sane?
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How do you advise a person who’s fresh out of an abusive relationship to move on and stay sane?
The truth is, when people are in abusive relationships, they do not tell those around them. It’s only normal right, why would I want everyone to know my supposed partner abuses me and all. But the funny thing is, people always know, they may not tell it to your face, but they always have a way of knowing especially if they are close to you. But, I go out of my way to admire and empathize with those ones that speak out and eventually leave such relationship. It’s a lot, it takes a lot of determination and ability to not fold, not if you’ve spent substantial part of your life with the abuser. The best thing to do for such a person is to be present, let your present be felt by them. Be available for them, emotionally and physically. Honestly, being a listening ear to them is the best you can offer them at this period. Do not choke them with questions, or ask questions that may suggest they’ve been foolish or stupid. You really do not want them feeling that way, make them feel like they are so much more. No one deserves to be abused, no one.
As important as it is to be supportive by being a listening ear to them at such time, letting them talk, it’s just as important not to make or force them to talk. Someone who has left an abusive relationship has a lot of emotions. They may not know where to begin when it comes to processing them. They may also not want to talk about the abuse they endured. It’s okay if they want to process things privately. For someone who just left an abusive relationship, getting their life back to normal is incredibly important. And a good way to support them is to allow yourself to be a distraction for them. Make it clear that you still see them as the same person they were, even if they may not feel like the same person. You can go out together to have fun, even if it means pretending everything is okay for that time.