When I learned that my step father had molested my sister for years and threatened her safety and that of my mother, I seriously considered killing him. I chose not to for the simple reason that I’d most definitely get caught and he would have taken even more from me. When I look at him, I see a deeply damaged man. He too was molested by his brother, grew up in extreme poverty, abandoned by his mother and surviving the brutal streets of Detroit. I am not making excuses, I’m only realizing that no one is born a monster and it is our culture that creates such. He was a violent, tyrant and hateful, bully, but inside he was a frightened, insecure, self-hating, man who now lives alone, forgotten. I spent years wanting to gut him like a fish and now I just pity him. As hard as it is to find compassion for such people, it’s the only way to learn how to prevent the making of them. As for them changing, I don’t think it’s possible