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Why do adults often neglect trauma in children?
Being around violence in cities, and other types of domestic violence/verbal abuse/extreme controlling environments that is shrugged off far too often still if it is under a certain amount. It is normalized in their environment and so is often not fully realized until they are older teens, or even aRead more
Being around violence in cities, and other types of domestic violence/verbal abuse/extreme controlling environments that is shrugged off far too often still if it is under a certain amount. It is normalized in their environment and so is often not fully realized until they are older teens, or even adults if at all sometimes. Living in an area that is prone to natural disasters, and not having a very supportive family/adults, or suddenly not having supportive adults to help with the stress of it when it happens quite often is very jarring.
See lessWhat most don’t understand is that trauma can be very subtle and can begin at any age, actually even prior to birth. It doesn’t take a major event or anything life threatening to create deeply hidden and repressed fear from a painful experience. And the truth is it can cause even more harm and dysfunction in our adult lives than dramatic trauma, because that is more likely recognized and help is usually offered at that time. And this is because we can easily fail to recognize that we are communicating with our children long before they can speak or understand, often believing it won’t matter because we don’t hold early memories in the open. Needing to take on large responsibilities far earlier than they are ready to because of ongoing family issues, causing (or from) neglect they do not realize.
What are the things you wish parents stopped doing to their children?
I wish parents could actually make their decision whether they trust their kids or not. Growing up, I wished my parents would mind their own goddamn business. They would, at times, look through my computer and devices and read my private conversations I have with my friends. It’s extremely vexing, iRead more
I wish parents could actually make their decision whether they trust their kids or not. Growing up, I wished my parents would mind their own goddamn business.
See lessThey would, at times, look through my computer and devices and read my private conversations I have with my friends. It’s extremely vexing, it’s like they can’t trust me.
I have private conversations for a reason, either it is personal to me or the other person. That’s why they’re private. By reading through them my parents can know what the other person is telling me. This other person trusts me enough to tell me, and now my parents know because they snoop around on my devices. It makes me feel like an untrustworthy person and I hate it. Even though it’s not really my fault. I still feel bad.
It’s not like I’m doing anything bad either, just talking to my friends online and they think that’s a bad thing… I don’t understand it.
I feel like I can’t be trusted by them, yet they say they trust me. It seems twisted in my mind. They let me do these things and fake how much freedom I have, they say they trust me to not do stupid things online, yet they go behind my back and do this.
I also hate that they pry me for information at times. My mother asks way too many questions. Even if it’s just about homework, she just wants to be too involved in my life. If I want her to know something, I’ll tell her on my own and if she has to pry me for information, then obviously I don’t want to tell her.