I’ve not been feeling the thanksgiving for a while now, but I guess the pandemic made it worse this year. I simply just want to remove myself from the (unnecessary) celebration.
I understand that thanksgiving is a very important holiday especially for families, but I don’t get comfortable celebrating it anymore. How can I always excuse myself from my family during every thanksgiving?
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The best way to handle this is similar to any other event you attend. If you knew you would not be able to attend an event, the proper etiquette would be to RSVP as soon as you know; the same goes for your family. As soon as you know or as soon as you are even considering not going, then you should let your family know. The important thing is to be confident in your decision and in relaying that decision to your family. Your family is always going to want you home to spend time with you, and if they think you are not set in your decision, they will try to make you reconsider. The more confident you are, the easier it will be to tell your family. You don’t want to get caught in a lie. Be resolute in your decision, and let your family members know that it is not them, but it’s time for something new, or you wish to keep your exposure low with COVID-19 numbers on the rise. Coronavirus cases are rising in practically every state, and though there may be ways to commune with your family safely — provided you follow protocols and guidelines from the experts — the most responsible thing to do is to limit travel and stay home. These are simple facts.
Before you talk to your family, think about all of the reasons your plans make sense and are OK. Be confident in your decision. It is courteous to let someone know as early as possible that you won’t be attending an event they’re expecting you at, and your family deserves that same respect. There’s a chance that they’ll make other plans as well—like booking a just-for-two vacation, making arrangements with friends, or simply cooking different foods—and the longer you delay, the more inconvenient and difficult it will be for them to have a holiday they feel good about. Also, the more time passes, the more instances there are likely to be in which they’ll say things like “we can do this or that in December when you’re home” and you’ll have to lie either directly or by omission. You don’t want to find yourself in a situation where they are pissed at you for not saying something sooner. So communicate your “no” RSVP to them as soon as you make that decision.